Hi, Loves.
How are you? I hope you are all doing well. I'm doing good, thanks. Today I want to talk about how you protect your soul. Particularly after you've been hurt mentally.
I have a negative and unloving family. No matter what I do or say, its wrong. Last Saturday, my Troll (aka Dad) demanded that I take him out to see his brother. I did.
I sat at their table and jabbered my face off. I think its my protective instinct to run the conversation so I don't hear their negative comments. I heard them anyway.
I was okay with their negative comments, as I've heard them often, but I felt massive heart pain when I heard my Troll apologize for me. *Sigh*
I know more medical drama than I want to. I've saved his life countless times. I keep him alive and do everything for him by myself. The apology cut me hard. I'm not an only child just the only child that cares.
On the drive home, he lost his temper and started name calling. *Sigh* I've heard more about how he truly feels than a daughter should. Parents should love their kids. Kids should love their parents. I'm in a one-sided love thy parents. *NO pity, please.*
I get him home and do my nightly routine. He went to sleep and I closed the house down for the night. The glare of my screen shown bright. I tried everything to stop the hurt from being a dam of tears.
Sadly, it didn't work. I ran to the bathroom, sat on the closed toilet lid and sobbed like the Devil himself set me on fire. I sobbed ugly sounds to the point my next door neighbor and his girl friend heard me.
She said "I don't know how she survives this time after time." I didn't wait for his reply. I wiped my nose, washed my hands and went to bed.
As I sat in the middle of my bed struggling to find control, I felt my spirit animal awaken. My spirit animal is the Owl. They are considered evil because of their sight. The sight that helps them see through the darkness and see the future.
I call Owl's hooties. I nickname or claim beings that mean a lot to me and try to discard those that don't. I sat there and bowed my head. I prayed for strength and recovery. I prayed for love and forgiveness. I prayed for everyone...even those that hurt me.
The next morning he acted like he had the night before but I refused to shed another tear. I took it to the paper. As I was drawing, I thought that I'd include a special group to join me in spiritual healing.
I gave a small supply list that consisted of a sheet of loose leaf paper and a pencil. I wanted them to think about people they face that make them feel less than they are. I wanted them to meditate and then awaken their animal spirit.
Your animal spirit is sassy and not afraid to show the emotion heartless people need to see. They protect you soul and their foundation is your heart.
I will post the drawing soon and explain the true meaning as many would love a visual.
I want you to be blessed on your journey, blessed in your life and thank you for blessing me with your presence.
Love Always,
Theresa (T, Sassy T)
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